>You know what is most important in the world?
The thing that is making me realize…
it is totally fine,
that life goes on,
and the twists and turns and shocks and surprises
and hurts and wounds and mistakes and ugliness…
none of it matters…as long as there is this:

This, and the little miracle growing inside me.
And I am so thankful,
that I am realizing,
my life is full.
and happy
and I have so many blessings…
some I didn’t realize until I was forced to re-evaluate.
I paced my room in the  middle of the night last night,
just seething with anger.
Not being able to sleep,
full of adrenaline, confusion and well…rage.
but when I peeked in on the little one,
it calmed me right down.

Even when I am sad,
(and this whole thing is very very sad for me)
but even during this mess…
I know, I have so much life and fun and love around me.

So today,
I am feeling peaceful. 
Now I am going to MOPS,
to see some friends,
drink some hot chocolate,
make plans,
and move forward.



9 Responses to “>Thankful”

  1. 1 BigP's Heather December 3, 2010 at 2:39 pm

    >Do you know how much women pay to get their hair to look like that?!?! I WANT THAT HAIR!!!

  2. 2 Crossed Fingers December 3, 2010 at 3:31 pm

    >*hugs* It's amazing how much weight a child's smile can lift off your shoulders.

  3. 3 Niksmom December 3, 2010 at 3:50 pm

    >*tap, tap, tap* Hey, don't forget those of us inside your computer, too. ;-)I think I just heard the sound of a perspective shift. Awesome. xo

  4. 4 heartincharge December 3, 2010 at 6:12 pm

    >So glad you are feeling better! and what great reasons :)You took your happiness out of their hands, looked around at your everyday life without them, and made yourself happy.

  5. 6 Kelly December 4, 2010 at 8:27 pm

    >One of the best posts I've read all week!

  6. 8 Photogrl December 7, 2010 at 8:33 pm

    >I really hope your evening at MOPS was enjoyable.He is the cutest kid ever. EVER.

  7. 9 Abby December 24, 2010 at 10:26 am

    >Happy holidays to everyone!

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